周子皓教案8作文
六年级 记叙文 10229字 84人浏览 401795349

一对一授课教案

学员姓名:____周子皓_____年级:__高二_______所授科目:___英语__________

一、写作的基本要求

1、信息完整(所写的文章中一定要包含所有的写作内容)

2、不超过5句话(句子的复杂性,多使用从句,非谓语动词和连词及一些复杂的句型)

3、内容清楚连贯,逻辑性强(使用恰当的连词,使文章连贯)

4、尽量减免语法错误

一、基础写作评分说明

基础写作主要考查考生语言结构的应用能力:能够用正确、规范的语言表达特定的内容。 本试题要求考生根据所提供的信息,使用5个句子表达【写作内容】所提供的全部内容。

命题思想是希望考生在表达这些内容时能够: ● 正确使用同位语、分词短语等来整合信息。

● 正确使用复合句,比如:宾语从句、主语从句、状语从句等。例如:It is reported that

the Chinese version of the book began to sell in China early 2011.

评分时,应注意以下几个方面:

1. 按照评分标准,实行分析法评分:按语言、内容和连贯三项标准分别给分;

2. 在语言方面,重点评判句子的语法结构是否正确、用词是否规范、考生是否使用了

合适的句子结构;

3. 在内容方面,重点评判考生是否表达了所提供的全部信息;如果考生在表达完整的

内容时,适当添加一些内容,不扣分;

4. 在连贯方面,重点评判5个句子是否构成一篇连贯的短文。

二、写作技巧以及顺序

A. 通篇浏览,把握整体。浏览文章信息,并对其进行处理,将其分割成五句话,做到哪句话包含哪些信息心中有数。

B. 集中兵力,逐个击破。在第一步的基础上,把五个句子逐一写清楚,包含所需信息。在组织句子时注意以下几点:

1. 一个句子首先要找清楚主谓宾,然后想办法拓展这句话,把其它的信息加进去。

2. 一个句子有且仅有一个谓语(并列谓语)。

改错:

I writing the letter to complain about I bought the shoes recently.

3. 将多个句子并到一起,并且要做到只有一个谓语的话,有3种方法:

1)使用各种连词。

More than 50% of the students in China are short-sighted and it ranks the first in the world. 句中用到and 连接2个并列简单句,前后都可保留谓语,顺利将2句变成一句。

连词包括具有递进关系的并列句, 如由and ,then ,besides ,in addition, furthermore,moreover, what’s more等连接的并列句,具有转折关系的并列句,如由but ,however ,on the contrary, after all等连接的并列句,具有平行选择关系的并列句,如由both…and…,as well as,as well,neither…nor…or,either…or…,not only…but also…等连接的并列句。

2)使用从句。包括含有名词性从句的复合句,含有定语从句的复合句,含有状语从句的复合句。

More than 50% of the students in China are short-sighted, which ranks the first in the world.

3)使用非谓语动词,及一些特殊句型。如使用强调句、倒装句、含有with 复合结构的句子、there be开头的句子、以形式主语it 开头的句子等。

More than 50% of the students in China are short-sighted, ranking the first in the world.非谓语动词ranking 作结果状语,表“主动”。

C. 想办法为作文加分

1. 多多使用各种连词,使文章更为连贯。

顺接/递进:Firstly/ secondly/thirdly, besides, in addition, what’s more, what’s worse, what’s more important, moreover, also, finally, last but not least,.

转折:but, however, nevertheless(然而), yet, instead, on the other hand, on the contrary, although, while

原因:because, because of, since, as, for, now that, thanks to, due to

结果:so, therefore, as a result, so that, then, so …that, such …that

总结:to sum up, to conclude, in conclusion, in summary, finally, in a word, in general, in short, above all, after all, generally speaking,

2. 多使用高级词汇,句式和短语进行变换,不要重复使用一个句式和短语。同时要注意避免常见错误:

1)不要为了减少句数而不断使用逗号,一定要通过从句,连词,非谓语等来减少句数。 如:It was raining hard, they could not work in the fields. 改为:

It was raining hard, so they could not work in the fields.

They could not work in the fields, because it was raining hard.

2)时态错误:一定要根据文章的语境判断该使用的时态

实战演练一

用不同的句型写出下面的句子。

经历 心情

被接纳为亚运会志愿者 兴奋

01 同位语从句: The news that i was accepted as the volunteers for the Asian Games made me very excited.

02 宾语/主语从句: It made me very excited / I felt very excited that i had been accepted as the volunteers for the Asian games.

03 状语从句: When i heard that i had been accepted as the volunteers for the Asian Games, i felt very excited.

04 定语从句: I was accepted as the volunteers for the Asain Games, which made me very excited.

05 非谓语动词: Hearing that i had been accepted as the volunteers for the Asian Games, i felt very excited.

06 普通连词:I was accepted as the volunteers for the Asian Games and i felt so excited about it. 07 倒装句/强调句:It was last week that i was accpeted as the volunteers for the Asian Games and I felt so excited about it.

实战训练二

第一节 基础写作 (共1小题,满分15分)

假设你是你校校园广播站的记者,请根据以下内容给广播站写一篇英语新闻报道。

[写作内容]

[写作要求]

1. 只能使用5个句子表达全部所给要点; 2. 报道中不得提及考生所在学校及本人姓名。 To celebrate the great achievements in the past 30 years of reform and opening up,a speech contest organized by Senior Two was held in the gymnasium of our school on the afternoon of March 15th, 2010. More than 1200 people were lucky to listen to the speeches on the spot, including all the teachers and students in Senior 2, the leaders of our school and parents of some students. Eighteen contestants / candidates from different classes in Senior Two delivered wonderful speeches very fluently. Some of them talked about the great changes which had taken place in our country through their personal experiences and others sang high praise for the wise policy of reform and opening up by comparing the present of their hometowns with the past. This activity made us more confident and proud of our country and we all made up our mind to study harder to build our country more beautiful.

实战训练三

基础写作

假设你是李华,昨天下午参加了英语才艺大赛(Talent Show),并获得一等奖。以下是参加情况及获奖感受:

1. 看别人比赛时:紧张;

2. 自己表演时:想起Mike 数月的努力与帮助,冷静;

3. 在最有挑战的问答环节:谨记Mike 的建议,顺利;

4. 宣布结果时:兴奋,遗憾Mike 不在场。

[写作内容]

请根据以上介绍,给回美国度假的外籍教师Mike 写一封感谢信,内容包括:

1. 告知获奖;

2. 介绍参赛情况;

3. 表达获奖感受。

[写作要求]

只能用5个句子表达所给的全部内容。信的开头与结尾已给出。

[评分标准]

句子结构准确,信息内容完整,篇章结构连贯。

Dear Mike

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________

Please accept my warmest thanks. I look forward to your return to China.

Yours,

Li Hua

Dear Mike,

I’m writing to let you know that I won first prize in the English Talent Show yesterday afternoon. Before it was my turn I watched the others and got very nervous. But when I was on the stage, I thought of all your efforts to help me during the past few months and gradually calmed down. Although the question-and-answer section was the most challenging, I got through it quite smoothly by remembering all your suggestions. When the judge announced the result I was very excited but it was really a pity you were not there.

Please accept my warmest thanks. I look forward to your return to China.

Yours,

Li Hua

实战训练四

第一节 基础写作(共1小题,满分15分)

你是校报小记者,最近进行了一次采访。以下是这次采访的情况:

[写作内容]

根据以上情况写一篇采访报道,并包括如下内容:

1. 采访的时间、对象和主题;

2. 中小学生近视的发生率及人数;

3. 专家解读。

[写作要求]

只能使用5个句子表达全部内容。

[评分标准]

句子结构准确,信息内容完整,篇章结构连贯。

【答案】Last weekend, I had an interview with eye-doctor Professor Wang about our country primary and middle students’ short -sightedness. It is said that slightly more than 50% students, which ranks the No. 1 in the world, are short-sighted. Professor Wang said the reason of short-sightedness is complicated and three is still no cure for short-sightedness. He suggested that we should not overuse our eyes and do more outdoor exercises. What’s more, since the holding of pen has something to do with the short-sightedness, we need to pay attention to using the pen.

实战训练五

III. 写作(共两节,满分40分)

第一节:基础写作(共1小题,满分15分)

最近你们学校组织了一次高三年级学生成人仪式。请根据以下内容给学校英语墙报写一

参考词汇: 成人仪式 coming-of-age ceremony

[写作内容]

请根据以上内容给学校英语墙报写一篇通讯,内容包括:

1. 成人仪式的时间、地点、对象;

2. 成人仪式的目的、过程;

3. 个人感受。

[写作要求]

只能用5个句子表达全部内容。

[评分标准]

句子结构准确,信息内容完整,篇章结构连贯。

More than 1500 students in Senior Three in our school attended the coming-of-age ceremony at 3:00 p.m. on May 4th , 2011 on the playground. The aim of the ceremony is to build up the awareness of students’ responsibility. Students sang a song to appreciate their parents first and then hugged them in the ceremony. Besides, they swore that they would become qualified citizens and devote themselves to society and serve the country. Deeply moved I think the ceremony is of great significance and have a deep influence on us.

30个词的摘要怎么写?

写摘要应主要注意以下四个方面:

一、内容上:抓主要信息点

抓住文章的主要信息点、剔除细节信息是写摘要的基本要求。那么,哪些是文章的主要信息点呢?下面就议论性文章和叙事类文章分别举例加以说明。

1、议论性文章的主要信息点

议论文的内容包括“观点(或问题)、论据、结论“三个方面,所以写议论文的摘要就是要把这三个方面说清楚。这里需要注意两点:一是议论文的主体部分是论证的过程,论据占有很大的部分,但在写摘要的时候,不需要详细写论证的过程,因为它有很多细节信息,而细节信息是写摘要所应该剔除的,所以议论文的摘要应当将 “观点、论据、结论”三个方面同等对待,这就如同画卡通人物,在人体的“头、身、脚”三大结构中,“身”本来是人体的主要部分,但在卡通画里,“头、身、脚”的比例几乎同等,特写“头”和“脚”能够达到突出重点的目的。二是所给的原文可能是议论文中节选的一个片段,不一定有完整的“观点+论据+结论”三个方面,所以写作时需要具体分析。

【例一】

原文:(见下面的分析部分,每句话前面的编号代表原文的顺序)

分析:这是一篇议论文中的部分片段,文中提出了三个主要观点,每提出一个观点之后,

摘要内容:(1)美国有很多汽车;(2)开车消耗了大量的(石油)资源;(3)生产车的过程也消耗了大量的资源(如运输、展览、维修等)。如果摘要概括了以上三个方面的内容,就是比较全面的,而且抓住了重点。

【例二】

原文:(见下面的分析部分,每句话前面的编号代表原文的顺序)

分析:这是一篇比较完整的议论文,从语言上看可能是中学生的习作,文章的结构包括“提

摘要内容:(1)方言影响交流,必须推广普通话;(2)推广的方式包括:强调普通话的重要性、在教育等行业强制推行、全民教育普及;(3)推广普通话具有重要的意义。

2、叙事类文章的主要信息点

叙事类文章的内容包括“主题、情节和主旨”三个方面,其中情节是主要部分,“主题”和“主旨”有时藏于“情节”之中。但在写摘要时,不能仅仅描写情节,必要时要点出“主题”和“主旨”。

【例三】

原文:(见下面的分析部分,每句话前面的编号代表原文的顺序)

分析:这是一篇叙事类文章,夹叙夹议地讲了我父亲教育子女的一些故事情节,其中主

摘要内容:(1)我父亲的家庭教育很特别;(2)他总是表扬、理解和支持我们;(3)得益于父亲的教育,我取得了成功。

以上通过三个例子说明了如何概括议论性文章和叙事性文章的主要内容,其主要方式就是通过解析文章结构和功能来找出主要内容。

二、语言上:不能抄袭

写摘要不是缩写,不能引用原文的语句;写摘要也不是改写,不能把原句加以变形就完事;写摘要主要是概括和抽象化,把具体的信息用一些具有高度概括功能的词和句表达出

来。所以,写摘要最好自己重新组织语句。那么,什么样的句子可能会被列入抄袭的“黑名单”呢?

1、明显抄袭的句子

与原文某个或某些句子完全一致或大部分一致。

有同学写摘要就从原文的开头部分、中间部分和结尾部分各抄一句,以为这就是“摘要”,这种认识是错误的,这样的“摘要”是得不了分的。

2、疑似抄袭的句子

主要有这样几种情况:一是引用原文的核心词组;二是改动原句中的个别词汇,基本保留原句型;三是将原文从主动句改为被动句或者相反。如有关上面三篇例文的以下一些“摘要”都有抄袭的嫌疑:

(例一)America is a nation of automobile. (改动中间的个别词,应当抄袭)

(例二)Nowadays, the barrier of dialects must be removed by populazing Mandarin because it has a bad effect on the quality and efficiency of oral communication. (保留了原文中的核心词组,有较大的抄袭嫌疑)

(例三)We were never criticized. (主动变为被动,有抄袭嫌疑)

三、逻辑上:做好与下文的衔接

在任务型写作中写摘要,还要考虑与下文的衔接,所以往往在写完摘要之后,还要有过渡词或过渡句。过渡句常见的有:

1、表达自己的意见

In my opinion, …; As far as I am concerned, …; As for me, …

2、表示赞同

I agree with the statement that…; I fully support the statement above because I am very sure…

3、表示不赞同

I feel such an attitude is negative, and that it can bring…; Some people argues as if it is a general truth that…; But to be frank, I cannot agree with them.

四、长度上:用2-3个句子

30个左右的词,用两到三个句子比较合适。因为词数比较少,不一定非要用写摘要的常见句型,比如像:The author thinks / argues…; According to the passage, …等。以上三篇摘要的参考范文如下:

例一参考摘要:

The USA has a large number of cars and each year a great deal of energy is consumed. The energy is used not only when driving cars but also when producing them.

例二参考摘要:

Due to the fact that many dialects in China are real obstacles for communicating, the author emphasizes the importance of popularizing Mandarin. He also suggests three ways of this activity. (30个词)

例三参考摘要:

The author’s father has a special way of teaching his children. He always praised them for their progress, explained to them what is good and encouraged them to be persistent. Because of this, the author made a success of his career.